What's been going on..
- We Finished PRIDE - assessment and all.
- We interviewed/spoke to over 6 adoption practitioners - all of which I found "something" wrong with...
- July (8th) we chose a pratitioner, Terri Sikora - over 20 yrs of experience both privately and via CAS. She sent us questionnaires (overwhelming) and Marc and I started/tried to make a dent...
- Meanwhile, we still had the questionnaires from CAS to fill out - more tedious simply because they were hard copies and typing was not an option (shake my head).
- August long weekend, I put my head down and went full steam ahead to complete MY questionnaires - then I could focus on getting the husband to complete his... One thing I'll say... the paper work, the length of time... EVERYTHING about this process (administratively) I really feel is just a way to weed out the "fad-ers" from the "for-real-ers" - if that makes any sense...
- After I completed my portion, Marc was right around the bend... and our first of four meetings with Terri was Aug 15.
- The first meeting was almost 3 hours long, not hard, but exhaustive - I probably did that to myself simply b/c I was so focused on making a good impression - and also worried that my pups would eat her which surely wouldn't help in convincing her that we were a safe environment LOL!
- the next interview - one week later was one on one with Marc, and the third was her and me.
- With all of the messed up drama in my life (as of late)... I really was not keen on meeting with her. Again, I thought she would find me unfit, unable to deal with conflict appropriately (my mother issues), i don't know.... a whole lot of fears haunted me. I mainly did NOT want to shed a tear, and at the time (early sept), hearing my name said in the wrong (unintentional) tone would make those tears flow.
- By God's grace... that meeting went superb. No tears. Strength. Focus. Precise answers. Honest. Genuine. And towards the end, Terri stared at me and said Crystal, I want you to know, this is not you. The conflict you are facing with your mother, is now in her court and there is nothing more you can do. These words, have been said to me by some of my dearest, most loving friends NOT TO MENTION my spouse... but they needed to be heard from her... this time. And this weight... was lifted.
- At this stage... we have now completed 3 of 4 home studies. We have completed our Criminal/RCMP checks and are simply waiting for them in the mail. MAJORITY with the exception of two references have come back... and Terri says we just wait...
- Regarding that CAS package that I said was overwhelming in hard copy... we FINALLY dropped it off on Tuesday (this past tuesday). Yes.. it has been awhile but... there were some hard questions (mainly the child checklist) that I was wanting to avoid.
And everytime I said no... for the times I said no... I pictured myself, staring a child in the face and damning them to a life without a family...Self Inflicted guilt much? So, the checklist was a challenge, and as such, I avoided... nonetheless.. we completed everything and finally delivered it.
Today, I received an email from Suzanne Gri (lovely lady) confirming she received my (expansive package) and was holding on to it until everything else arrived...
- Adoption Homestudy
- Medical Report (for each applicant)
- Medical Specialist Letters if you have seen a specialist/therapist in the last five years
- Financial Statement
- Local Police Clearances (for each applicant)
- Foreign Police Clearances if you lived for any time as an adult (18+) in a foreign jurisdiction
- References (5)
- Child Welfare Agency Record Checks – A foreign child welfare record check is also required if you lived for any time as an adult (18+) in a foreign jurisdiction (this may be difficult in some cases, please indicate this early in the process so the issue can be resolved).
- Home Safety Checklist
- Questionnaires #1 & #2
- PRIDE Homework and Trainers Notes
Yup... so I sit there and wonder... have I really accomplished ANYTHING?!?!?!?!
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